i have frequent dreams about my mom. in most of them, she’s on fire. not stopdropandroll fire, but surrounded by flames, almost angelic looking. they’re not scary or morbid or even hellish - they’re actually quite peaceful. it’s nice to be able to see her face. and her hair.
perhaps the fire comes from seeing her [...]
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i really was that excited. that’s how i felt anyway. a kid in a candy store. giddy. joyful. i could hardly contain myself.
it was all chase - holding my precious baby toddler for the first time in over 48 hours. he let me snuggle him, hug him, kiss him and love on him. and he did [...]
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it’s been a rough weekend. i dropped chase off with M on Friday morning, anticipating seeing him on Friday evening due to a day switch i blame on father’s day. though, early friday, i was informed that chase wouldn’t be available for me to pick up on friday. or saturday. and [...]
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it took over 2 hours to get chase to sleep tonight. every time i would leave his room, he cried hysterically- tears streaming down his face, barely able to breathe. it hurt my heart.
at one point, i had to leave his room. it was just for a moment and trying to explain [...]
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about 3 years ago, my dog, dexter, got sick. not just goddy (typo, but i’m leaving it) vomit here & there, but sicksicksick sick.
i remember the day clearly. i was almost 5 months pregnant with chase, with it being 7 months after i had lost the first baby. i was panicked. [...]
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i think about my mom very often - nearly every day, if not every day. and i know, if she were here right now, she’d probably be living with me and spending every free moment she had with chase.
i always told her that i would take care of her. we’d buy a lot of land [...]
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someone must, please, explain to me why it is so hard for you to think of anyone other than you. and while it might have been cute for you to be cocky & sarcastic & selfish when we were in our teens and early twenties, it is SOOOOOOOOO not now (though it really wasn’t that cute [...]
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